Saturday, July 03, 2004

How to Win the Division

- hire a hitman to kill off all the Yankees except for Halsey, Lieber, and Bubba Crosby
- contaminate the Yankees food/water supply with intestinal parasites
- dig up the wrong Giambi and somehow switch his brain with the right Giambi
- convince aliens to kidnap Joe Torre
- convince Derek Lowe that aliens have kidnapped Joe Torre
- pray to whatever god there is that he/she/it favor the Sox this year and smite the Yankees

or, the best way to win out of all options...
- play as well as they did tonight on a regular basis

I think I like that one and convincing Lowe that aliens kidnapped Torre the most.


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